Relationships
Get Your Confidence Back
Stop putting yourself down, dare to ask, speak up and act. You don’t lack worth, you lack proof: thirty days to gather it.
- 30-day program
- 96 pages
All ebooks / Relationships
Relationships
Why He Pulls Away When You Get Attached
Calm anxious attachment, soothe the fear of abandonment and love without losing yourself.
- 21-day program
- 85 pages
- PDF, English
$15Read on any screen, print the fill-in pages
Get this ebookWho it’s for
Anyone whose inner alarm runs wild when a partner pulls away, and who wants to love without losing themselves.
What you will do
- Understand attachment styles, your alarm system and protest behaviors, without labels
- Soothe the alarm with 7 protocols and an everyday toolbox
- Ask for what you need clearly, choose secure relationships and decide when to stay or leave
Also included
- 28 word-for-word scripts
- A self-observation exercise inspired by the ECR scale
- A 21-day program
Look inside
Three real pages from the ebook. Tap one to open it in full size, then zoom in to read.
Table of contents
Introduction — The scene everyone recognizes p. 4
- What this book will teach you to do differentlyp. 5
- How to use this workbook — the 21-day programp. 6
Part 1 — Understanding your attachment p. 7
- Where attachment comes from: Bowlby, Ainsworth and adultsp. 8
- The styles, simplyp. 9
- The anxious profile, in detail and without caricaturep. 10
- Avoidant, disorganized — and why these are strategies, not labelsp. 11
- Self-observation inspired by the ECR scale (1/2)p. 12
- Self-observation (2/2) — reading your results without judging yourselfp. 13
- Your alarm system: hyperactivationp. 14
- Protest behaviorsp. 15
- The anxious-avoidant dance: pursuit and withdrawalp. 16
- Getting out of the dance without playing a rolep. 17
- Six myths to dismantle (1/2)p. 18
- Six myths to dismantle (2/2) + the essentials of part 1p. 19
Part 2 — Soothing your alarm system p. 20
- The window of tolerance: your state of functioningp. 21
- Mapping your personal triggers (1/2)p. 22
- Mapping your triggers (2/2) — your alarm journalp. 23
- Protocols 1 to 7p. 24
- Your everyday soothing toolboxp. 31
Part 3 — Communicating without losing yourself p. 32
- Expressing a need without begging or accusingp. 33
- Secure request or protest? The before / after tablep. 34
- The clear request in 4 sentencesp. 35
- 28 word-for-word scriptsp. 36
- When the answer hurts: staying wholep. 43
Part 4 — Choosing and building secure p. 44
- Spotting emotional availabilityp. 45
- Neither green light nor red light: reading the gray areasp. 46
- The questions of the first weeksp. 47
- A healthy relationship rhythm — for your systemp. 48
- When he can't give you what you needp. 49
- Deciding: staying with full knowledge, or leavingp. 50
- Leaving cleanly, when you mustp. 51
- Your full life: the foundationp. 52
- Building your security, one day at a timep. 53
21-day workbook p. 54
- Day 1 — Photograph your alarmp. 55
- Day 2 — Your personal mapp. 56
- Day 3 — The letter of understandingp. 57
- Day 4 — Locate your windowp. 58
- Day 5 — The complete alarm journalp. 59
- Day 6 — Your personal mythsp. 60
- Day 7 — Week 1 reviewp. 61
- Day 8 — The text protocol, in real conditionsp. 62
- Day 9 — Your hands-on body sequencep. 63
- Day 10 — The evening-without-news planp. 64
- Day 11 — Jealousy and social media: the investigation detoxp. 65
- Day 12 — The slow repairp. 66
- Day 13 — The unsent letterp. 67
- Day 14 — Week 2 reviewp. 68
- Day 15 — Your clear request, in draftp. 69
- Day 16 — Personalize three scriptsp. 70
- Day 17 — Saying "I need more"p. 71
- Day 18 — Answering coolly, for realp. 72
- Day 19 — The rhythm you proposep. 73
- Day 20 — Your full-life planp. 74
- Day 21 — Review of the 21 days — and letter to your future selfp. 75
- What has changed — and what will still changep. 76
Printable sheetsp. 77
30-day maintenance plan p. 80
- Relapses — and when to ask for helpp. 81
One last word, for youp. 84
Ready to start?Instant PDF, English edition
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Frequently asked questions
What format are the ebooks?
PDF, to read on a computer, tablet or phone. The fill-in pages can be printed.
Can I write directly in the PDF?
The pages have lines to fill in. Write on paper after printing, or use the annotation tool of your PDF reader.
Do the ebooks replace medical or psychological care?
No. They are practical support tools. If you are going through a very hard time, talk to a professional.
Are the ebooks in English?
Yes. Every ebook on this page is the English edition.